Sunday, October 05, 2008
when something doesn't work
when something doesn't work, why do we insist on going back and trying again? i dated the same guy forever, we broke up and a few weeks later got back together only to break up again about a year or so later. he keeps telling me that he is going to change, we had dinner together last night because he called me and asked if we could sit down and talk. my brain said no, my heart said yes, i replied with i can't go down that same road again. i finally gave in because he wanted to "just talk". so at 5:30 we met at our favorite mexican restaurant and engaged in nothing but small talk for the first half hour. finally i asked what he wanted to talk about. it was like listening to a broken record, all i heard was i can change for you, i understand that you want to go out and have fun, i know i act like an old man, i can change for you, i am going to change, you can change me, i miss you, i really miss you, i don't know what to do. my response was another broken record; only you can change you, i am too young to just sit in front of the tv, i need more, i deserve more, i have heard for about four years now that one of your hobbies is dancing but we never went so let's go tonight. the response...i can't, i have to work up to it, i can't change overnight. my response...call me if you ever do change because we are not in the same place, i love you and i want and need more than a dinner and tv one night a week but i honestly don't think you will ever be in the same place that i am. it was still really early but i came home and cuddled with the dogs.
posted by DeDe @ 10:53 AM  
1 Comments:
  • At 4:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think you need to tell him that, even though you still love him, you can't wait around for him to change at a snails pace. And he needs to honestly express what he truely wants! Is he wanting part time company with a little action on the side, which makes you feel used, or does he want a committed relationship that he is willing to work at with you? He needs to be honest with himself and decide what he wants and take action from there. The comment " you can change me" leads me to think that he wants to change, doesn't know how nor wants to really put the effort needed to make any real type of change. Protect your heart, because you love so easily and I don't want you hurt again. Love Mel

     
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Location: Las Vegas, Nevada, United States

Proud mother of one fabulous daughter, proud owner of one really cute dog, old enough to know better, young enough to not care, hopeless romantic.

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